<?xml version="1.0" encoding="iso-8859-1"?><rss version="1.0"><channel><title>Diary of parul</title><link>http://paarul.rediffiland.com/</link><description>Diary of parul</description><language>en-us</language><item><title>dilemma</title><description><![CDATA[<P>Anu was very happy in the morning. Her son was participating in an english play at school.  Got up at 4.00  am to finish everything at home so that she can attend assembly function. But by the time it was 1.00 pm she was  very sick as she has been unwell since last so many days, She decided to  take 3 hrs break from office to take some rest and meet a doctor in the evening.</P><P> Just when she was about to reach  home , her phone rang. It was her husband saying that he has been out with a friend since morning and will be coming for lunch with him. Physically, her body refused to obey, but to say a word would have again started  the comments about her being antisocial, not wanting anyone to come home, unwilling to offer food to anyone etc. She spent two hrs in the kitchen  and when everything  was done, her husband comes home alone saying that she must not have cooked food with good intentions ( neeyat ) and so his friend did not come with him.</P><P> Be assured, she did not say a word. After another hour, it was time to go back to office while her husband, Adish decided  to go and give some  very urgent papers to  some one Anu knows very well. the papers were a little urgent though could wait for a day</P><P>Adish offered to  drop her at office and pick her back on his way back</P><P>Kids were asleep so she locked them and went ahead.. 2 hrs later, Adish picked her up and was in a very good mood. Anu asked her of what happened at the guys place where he has gone to give those papers.</P><P>'But I did not go there' was the reply.</P><P> Why , What happened , Anu asked.Did you happen to get some other urgent call, or you met someone</P><P>That was it. ! </P><P>"I am not supposed to tell you everytime I go out where I was "</P><P>"No Adi, I am not even asking. I am sorry I put up that question"</P><P>"Why do you try to control me everytime. Why should I answer you where I was"</P><P>"Its not like that Adi.I never ask you where u were. Its just that you said you will give my papers so I asked if it was something very urgent which came up. Any way , do'nt worry .I wl manage tomorrow and do the job"</P><P>"You always try to control my life. You always try to tell me I am not doing anything. And now you are arguing (jaban lada rahi ho ) "and a whole lot of angry words and accusations followed. By the time they reached Home,Anu was too frustrated with the state of affair as this sort of incidents were quite a regular affair.</P><P>"Adi please , there is a limit to my patience" and then followed some severe bashing as  a result her whole body is aching badly even today and she has bruises on her body.</P><P>And even today morning , when she tried to pacify him , he said I Do'nt want to live with you and will be better if u die. </P><P>A lot more things said which ........</P><P>How can so much hate come in a relationship.And She still loves him very much and wants him to be normal. She can not die as her kids are too young and she is not sure if he will be able to take care of them. She hates herself for making him hate her so much, It has to be her fault otherwise , He is a very nice and considerate person and people swear by his goodness</P><P>Can anyone tell her what to do? She has already vowed to him that she will not argue and ever ask him anything about his whereabouts. She can not leave him, loves him too much even now </P><P>How can she make him love her?</P>]]></description><pubDate>Thu, 07 Aug 2008 11:10:52 +0530</pubDate><link>http://paarul.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/08/07/dilemma-1.html</link></item><item><title>I need help</title><description><![CDATA[Hi friends<BR>I am pretty new to this blog world and this is my first attempt at the same<BR>At the moment I am writing all this to take some advice from some unknown good souls of this world. I need help and do not know whom to ask for the same , so if anyone out there can, pls do the same<BR> I have been married since last 11 years and ours is a pretty nice match as others see it.My husband is extremely handsome while I am very ordinary looking. It is an arranged marriage and initially he was not willing to get in this alliance but could not say no to his father. <BR>Ours were two very different families but I tried to cope up my best and adjusted in his family and made space for myself.In his family it is not a very good idea to respect women but I adjusted to that. I am a very simple person with no huge requirememts and I have tried to support him and fulfil his responsibilities to the best of my capacity <BR>I feel I have given my maximum to maintain this relationship and have two small kids whom I take care of with a fulltime job<BR>No matter how hard I try , something or the other happens after every 2-3  days which make him burst. After all these years, I dont know why I am  finding it so hard to forget the way he has beaten me up today even though that happens almost every week<BR><BR>I love him so much and he says I am shameless to love him when he hates me and does not want to see me.Its not that it is difficult to die but  I do not want my kids to suffer and I feel he also loves me.<BR>I can not talk to any of my friends as they all know him n I do not want to insult him in front of anyone who knows us   <BR>what shall I do?]]></description><pubDate>Tue, 10 Jul 2007 11:08:40 +0530</pubDate><link>http://paarul.rediffiland.com/blogs/2007/07/10/I-need.html</link></item></channel></rss>